Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Heat and Shirtless Men

There are a lot of bad things happening as a result of this heat wave across the USA. Crops are failing, ranchers are having to sell off their cattle because they can't feed or water them, wildfires blaze out of control due to the dry conditions, highway surfaces buckle because of the unreleating heat and many men cease to wear shirts when working outside!

This is a major issue for me, people! It's not like these men (or the ones I've seen all over town) are young, fit and tan, with 6 pack abs. Oh, no. They are middle aged, lumpy (or worse) and pasty white. Particularly disturbing are those whose bellies droop south over their waistbands.

I understand it is a free country and men can go shirtless because society does not think a man without a shirt is obscene, even though a woman without a shirt would be considered so. If you think it is so hot that you cannot wear a tee shirt, I suppose I could grant you a summer time allowance to wear a wife beater shirt, even though I hate those shirts and their name. Still, it would be better to see you in one of those than with your belly hanging out.

My plea is for those men who go shirtless is to cease and desist. Please. My eyes can't take much more of this! Take the pledge! I did.

Heat Pledge:
I hereby do solemnly pledge to keep my middle aged, lumpy, droopy self covered with clothing despite the heat. Amen.

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