Monday, June 22, 2015

Grief

The Husband died on June 11th.







I have cried, sobbed, wept, felt very sad and been grief stricken since that day.

Tonight, I bawled.

And bawled.

And bawled.

I bawled as I was cleaning out the refrigerator.

Sorting through the remnants of food brought to the house by friends and family,
I started making decisions about what to keep and what to throw away. 

My thought was, "Oh, this has been here too long. It's no good. Time for it to go."

Suddenly, grief hit me like a ton of bricks.

The Husband has been gone 11 days and he is never coming back.

How can that be?

I ran across this picture of him today. It's one of my favorites. 
It was taken on Johnson Mesa in the early 1990's.


6 comments:

  1. I am so, so sorry to hear this. My heart is breaking for you. May you find peace in the memories of your time together.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Jenn. I know I will find peace in the future, but this week has been so very hard. I miss your writing. I'm sure your life is busy, but just know I would be happy to read your blog again.

      Delete
  2. Oh Cindy, I didn't know. Thought he had some time left on this plane. I know you will desperately miss him; grieve for him and cry till you're all cried out. Wordsworth says a line in his poem Ode -"thoughts that do often lie too deep for tears". May your days get better and better. Love, Donna

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Donna, thank you for the comforting words and the Wordsworth quote. This week has been so very hard. I know it will get better, I just have to live through it. Thank you for your support.

      Delete
  3. To lose your spouse has got to be one of the greatest losses you experience. Be good to yourself and allow yourself to cry and grieve as long as you need. There is no time table. It will get better in time. I will keep you in my prayers.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Bella. Your words are so true.

      Delete